Why we struggle with anxiety, stress, fears and phobias

 

People struggle against anxiety attacks and phobias because they recognize that their fears are exaggerated and illogical. They try hard to talk themselves out of the fear. But that doesn't help. So they end up trying to avoid the fear, and that, unfortunately, just strengthens it.

 

When your brain gets a signal of danger, it triggers an immediate response, the familiar ‘Fight or Flight’ response. That's a good thing, because when we face danger, we need to react quickly and powerfully.

 

Humans evolved in a different world than the one we inhabit today. It was a world full of predators, without police or deadbolt locks. Our main job was to get enough to eat each day without becoming food for somebody else. We needed a good emergency alert system to keep us out of the jaws of predators.

 

If we had relied on the thinking, intellectual part of our brain, called the cerebral cortex, to keep us safe, we'd be extinct. It's too slow. It's good for writing a speech, and figuring out your income tax, but not for making snap decisions about danger.

 

The part of your brain that handles these ‘Fight or Flight’ responses is called the Amygdala. It is a little almond shaped part of your brain and is what makes these ‘Fight or Flight’ decisions. The Amygdala works quickly, without your conscious awareness, because speed is vital in protecting against threats. You only find out what the Amygdala did when you feel its effects in your body (all the familiar panic sensations) and in your behaviour (either stay and fight or run away).

 

Whenever we make a decision, there are two possible kinds of errors.

1. If your brain perceives a danger, when there isn't one, you get afraid, but you don't come to any harm

2. If your brain perceives there's no danger when there really is one, you feel okay, but you're going be harmed in some way

 

Your Amygdala doesn't care how many times it scares you unnecessarily. It just aims to keep you alive, so it will activate the stress mode in either instance as a precaution.

 

How your Amygdala Works

Your Amygdala is always watching, passively, in the background, for some sign of danger. When it sees one, true or false, it presses the "fight or flight" button and fills you with fear. In effect, it attaches a red tag to the perceived danger, so that next time you come across it, the red tag alerts the amygdala and you automatically go into the stress (fight or flight), mode. When the danger is real, that's a good thing. But your Amygdala will often make the mistake of seeing danger when there's none and so the red tag gets attached to the wrong things.

 

It Learns by Association, not Reason or Logic

When whatever the apparent danger was has passed, the Amygdala stands down and goes back to quietly watching. If you got scared by someone pointing a gun or knife at you and a red tag was attached to that situation, that's a good thing. But if you were scared or upset by a dog, or going up a ladder, or a nasty or embarrassing situation, for example, a red tag would be attached and that's a bad thing. Your Amygdala will see everything with a red tag as dangerous, and will make you afraid next time you either see a dog or a ladder, or think about, or come across a similar nasty or embarrassing situation.

 

The Amygdala learns by association (red tag). It associates the dog and the ladder and the situation, with danger, it doesn't learn by conscious thought. This is why you can't simply talk yourself out of a phobia or anxiety attack. The fear memory is stored as a conditioned fear, and can only be relieved by removing the red tag.

 

EFT does exactly that. It removes the red tag, so that next time you see a dog or a ladder, or that nasty or embarrassing situation, it does not initiate the stress (fight or flight) mode. You retain the memory, without the stress (fight or flight mode), being activated.